Origami Chewbacca I: Return of the Wookiee
Emperor Papertine’s Arrival
Ok, so I decided not to write this into my most recent case file, because it really doesn’t have any information key to the cause of the last one. (See “Darth Paper Strikes Back: An Origami Yoda Book” for that case) Anyway, THIS story isn’t really a case file, but it is something that my mom wanted done for an “Educational Writing Experience.” Basically, I’m forced to go to a writing class for the summer, and at the end of summer vacation, I have to read something about my childhood. And, since I never wrote it down, I’m doing it now; by writing about probably the most interesting thing that happened to me in 7th grade; save Dwight’s ingenious plan to be able to go to Tippett Academy with Caroline Broom.
…The ULTIMATE BATTLE between Good and Evil, Origami Chewbacca vs. Emperor Papertine! Here it is…
Just then, when all hope was lost, EMPEROR PAPERTINE himself burst through the door!
“Jedi Fools,” He yelled, “you will not stop me!”
The person who’s finger Papertine sat on laughed. I knew that laugh, but I couldn’t place it, we were, after all, in the almost pitch black auditorium. Then, Kellen did something I didn’t think he would do in a million years! But wait, I’m getting ahead of myself, I’ll just start from the beginning…
Darth Paper’s Announcement
This all started on that first month, when Origami Yoda, the amazing creation of my friend, Dwight Tharp, and Darth Paper, an Origami villain created by Dwight’s nemesis, Harvey Cunningham, began fighting in class. All of this was getting kinda old, but then, something REALLY WEIRD happened… In Biology class, Harvey stood up and yelled to the class, in his high, squeaky voice,
“Darth Paper has an announcement!”
I didn’t know what to think, I mean, Harvey was usually talking just to annoy us, but today, he seemed serious.
“There is a great disturbance in the Force,” Darth Paper said, “my old master, Emperor Papertine, has contacted me, and has a message for you all, bullies as well.”
Zack Martin’s eyes lit up.
“He is coming to McQuarrie Middle School, and if you do not do what I tell you, he will destroy all of you, except for the bullies. For them, he will keep them in mind, and give them all Origami apprentices. And as for the rest of you, you must prepare for his arrival, immediately! We need a giant vat of cheese, a ladder, and a welcome banner! he is said to come at the end of the month, right after lunchtime.”
Normally, I would expect this from Dwight, but Harvey? No way! It all went downhill from there…
Origami Yoda and the Return of the Wookie
By Tommy and Kellen
Kellen, what do you remember about Origami Chewbacca?
Oh, I thought that was a gorilla with a tie on!
Oh, yeah! Well, Origami Yoda was like, “Hrrm, listen to Darth Paper we must,” and I was like,”Why should we listen to him?” And he was like,“MUST!!!”
He does seem to have a habit of saying that. Anyway, then Dwight puts Origami Yoda in his pocket, and grabs his backpack! So, he opens it, and brings out Origami Chewbacca!
Wow, you just said an entire paragraph without going “Um…” And “Hmmm…..”
It’s big for me, but we are going into 8th grade once summer is over.
Anyway, Origami Chewbacca couldn’t really talk like the other things Dwight made, but, then again, Origami Yoda is the only one who gives great advice! And, Origami Chewbacca goes “Roar!”And I go “Cool!”
So, I think that when Dwight told Chewie and Yoda about Emperor Papertine, they were ready to help us!
Me: Thanks for your time, Kellen.
(Subject talks about how summer is going and topic changes)
Origami Chewbacca and September Fool’s Day
Well, Tommy was sick from school (and sick of Harvey) one day, so I get to write about what happened that day.
So, Dwight walks into school with a VERY straight face, and I hated it. He was, for that day, completely sane! No problem with him at all! So, I walk up to him, and he just has a completely normal conversation with me! Then he pulls out Origami Chewbacca, and makes him talk, in a rather growly voice.
“The Emperor has captured Kellen in the bathroom!”
Well, since Kellen has had bad bathroom problems before, I decided I would try to save him! When I walk in, I find Kellen, hung up on a bathroom stall door by his underwear, and whining “Murky! Help me!” “Ok!” I respond.
After I “save” Kellen, he tells me what really happened.
“Ok, Harvey has crossed the line! This morning, he hung me up on that door, and brought in like, half of the 7th grade, just to have a laugh!” Kellen explained.
Afterward, I went over to the Lunch table, (I took Tommy’s seat that day) and I asked Dwight why he lied.
“Purple!” said Dwight, smearing his biscuits in gravy like a maniac. I suspect that just that morning, he went into the bathroom, saw Kellen, and decided to make a joke. Before my mom drove me back home, I asked Dwight a second time.
“Happy September Fool’s Day!” he replied. So, I didn’t get my answer as clear as I wanted, but oh well.
Harvey’s comment: Yeah, sure! Like Dwight didn’t make enough of a fool of himself without my help!
Origami Chewbacca and the Battle of Cashyyyk!
When I returned the next day, I was greeted by same old, crazy, paper folding Dwight, and Origami Yoda.
“Help Origami Chewbacca, you must,” he said, “His favorite place in Dwight’s room, the dollar bill origami pile, under attack it is, by Crease Dooku, and his army of Origami Battle Droids!”
“Ok, how can I help him?”
“Origami Admiral Ackbar I have, helpful he will be,” said Origami Yoda.
So, I went over to Dwight’s house, blindfolded, of course, so I couldn’t see “The Horror,” as he said it. When I took off my blindfold, I was staring at a GIANT pile of Origami STAR WARS figures, all made of dollar bills! So, I dive in, and Dwight pops out from the pile!
“So, Tommy, are you ready to try?” asked Dwight.
“Do, or do not, there is no try,” I said to Dwight, in my best Yoda voice. Origami Chewbacca practically appears on Dwight’s finger, and tells me “Help me, please!”
I almost felt sorry for that piece of paper. I went in, with Origami Admiral Ackbar on my finger, and battled the Battle Droids! When it looked like victory, Crease Dooku emerged on Dwight’s finger, and we had the coolest light-paper duel ever!
Harvey’s Comment: Ok, this proves how crazed Dwight is, not only does he believe in a paperwad, but he also uses good money on stuff that could just be folded with regular paper! Then again, nothing is “normal” with weirdo Dwight.
Tommy’s Comment: (Soapy Talk)
Origami Chewbacca and the Final Week
Okay…The final week…Deep stuff.
Well, Sara and I have been preparing the school for Emperor Papertine’s arrival, and Lance and Quavondo helped, too. Sadly, Sara and I never got to talk, but, then again, when did we talk that year? But then, Harvey came with Darth Paper.
“Your preparations betray you,” Darth Paper said, “your feelings for this event are strong,” he continued.
“Harvey, why are you trying to make this harder than when Mr. Good Clean Fun and Soapy talked about some kind of Halfpott story?!?” I asked.
“I try so hard!” he replied.
“No, fall into cheese you will, before the week is done,” said Origami Yoda, as Dwight walked into the auditorium.
Anyway, those next four days were torture! Everyone was talking about “The new bully-to-nerd-ratio tool” And when Dwight found out that Caroline Broome, his “Friend who’s a girl and he has a crush on,” was changing schools, he was devastated.
But, when the final day came, things got STRANGE!
Origami Yoda’s prediction came true. Harvey was making fun of us when he fell into a giant vat of cheese meant for the event and made a total fool of himself. That isn’t the strange part; Origami Yoda’s predictions always come true! The strange part was that Dwight didn’t go to school that day, the one day he NEEDED to be there! If he didn’t come, Emperor Papertine might get angry at us for not bringing his arch enemy!!! It’s a good thing that at least we have Origami Chewie with us, just in case. (He can rip an arm from a socket, y’know, he might be able to defeat Darth Shredious, or whoever it is).
So, during Lunchtime, as we were almost ready to greet Papertine, Harvey, completely cheese free, talks to us before Papertine arrives.
“Y’know, guys, Darth Paper might accept an apology from you for being mean to us, and he could tell the Emperor that he doesn’t have to destroy you. How about that?”
“Look, Harvey,” I started.
“What, are you gonna say no?!? That’s so like you, Tommy, never being a big man and taking responsibility for his actions, like me! I mean, I’M so great, I’M so responsible, I’M-“
Just then, a very angry Kellen punched Harvey, with Origami Chewbacca, right in the nose! Chewbacca ripped off Darth Paper’s arms, and pushed Harvey, who accidentally tipped over a ladder, and the ladder hit the power box! The box blowed a fuse, just before the school bell went off, signaling that Emperor Papertine was here!
Just then, when all hope was lost, EMPEROR PAPERTINE himself burst through the door! “Jedi Fools,” He yelled, “you will not stop me!” The person who’s finger Papertine sat on laughed. I knew that laugh, but I couldn’t place it, we were, after all, in the almost pitch black auditorium. Then, Kellen did something I didn’t think he would do in a million years!
Origami Chewbacca and the Truth
Kellen ripped off one side of the welcome banner from the wall, used the other side of the banner to hoist himself into the air, pulled up the ladder, climbs up it, and throws Origami Chewbacca, who hits on the power box, restoring the light to the school!
Once we were out of the dark, I could tell who was holding Emperor Papertine!
Every kid in McQuarrie Middle School yelled out his name.
“What are you doing?” I asked.
“I’m being Emperor Papertine,” Dwight says, in his “Matter of fact” voice. Harvey was having a ball. “Yes! Dwight owes me twenty bucks!” he said. I was really confused.
“Alright, look,” said Dwight, as he cowered and stuffed himself in a corner, “as you all know, Harvey and I have been fighting for the past month, and no matter what I did, he wouldn’t stop! So, I said to him, ‘Harvey, please stop!’ And so Harvey said, ‘how about I make you a bet, if I win the next Origami Lightsaber duel, you have to pretend to be an Origami Emperor that will destroy the school, give me twenty dollars, AND make an Origami character for every bully in the school!’ And so I said, ‘Well, if I win, you will have to say to the entire 7th grade that you were wrong about Origami Yoda, and that you are sorry.’ So, I lost; purple.”
“Dwight!” I said, “You don’t have to listen to Harvey, he’s just a jerk who doesn’t know when enough is enough.”
“You’re right, Tommy, thanks!” said a very cheerful Dwight. He never stays down about anything for long.”Hurtful!” yelled Harvey, still trying to fix Darth Paper’s arms, and cuddling his new, crisp 20 dollar bill.
Then, Dwight folded an Origami Grievous for every bully in the school, and walked out of the auditorium, carrying Origami Chewbacca.
So, after all that, I think that we need a rest.
The story’s over, but I still have to read it at the end of the summer, so, I guess I can edit it.
The End This Is?
By SuperFolder JC; 4/18/12